


In A Court of Law

by ninaaavan



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Lawyers, Dark Comedy, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:07:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27443878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninaaavan/pseuds/ninaaavan
Summary: A look into the lives of attorneys Jeno and Renjun and their judge boyfriend, Jaemin.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 129
Collections: '00 FIC FEST ROUND TWO





	In A Court of Law

**Author's Note:**

> I did my best to fulfill the request for dark humor. I played around with the format in this work too, so I hope you all enjoy it.  
> #0071

It’s another monotonous morning, soul-sucking afternoon, and reposeful evening in the polished heart of N City. 

Renjun removes his shoes in the doorway and places them in his designated shelf spot. The house is quiet and he’s feeling pretty drained. Jaemin pops his head out of the kitchen to greet him with a smile, "hey Junnie, dinner's almost ready."

Whatever he’s making smells heavenly. The scent and his boyfriend’s blinding smile are enough to make him feel like he’s a device with a low battery warning that just got plugged into a wall charger. 

"You're a godsend," he answers back as he trudges across the living room. "I'm gonna go change."

Jaemin nods and ducks back into the tidy kitchen. 

Renjun makes short work out of changing and heads to the kitchen to keep Jaemin company. He's also some weird sort of excited to finally be able to complain about work to someone who isn't his co-worker. 

"How was your day?" He asks Jaemin first out of courtesy. It's polite and Renjun was raised to at least pretend like he cares for social niceties-- which is not to say that listening to his boyfriends talk about their days was done out of anything other than interest. What’s nice about court is that he doesn’t have to pretend and ask questions. 

"Hm? Oh, fine. Donghyuck was my bailiff for the day."

"Hmm," Renjun hums in acknowledgement. He leans heavily on the counter. "Did he get to give anyone the smack down today?"

Jaemin snorts, "no, but the jury found the defendant in one of the cases not guilty of drug possession and then she asked if she could have her drugs back." It's Renjun's turn to snort and then Jaemin continues. "I had to call a recess because no one could handle it. If that lawyer, Nakamoto, -- you know the one who almost jumped the bench?-- was her counsel I think he would've lost it."

Renjun nods and hums once more, “heard from Jen yet?”

Jaemin nods, “he should be here by the time food is ready. He hit the gym before coming home.”

“Must’ve been a tough day for our muscle boy,” Renjun comments like it’s off-handed. In reality it is a carefully structured segue into his time to gripe and grumble.

“How was your day?” Jaemin returns as was expected of him.

“You would not believe what I had to deal with today. I just took on a high profile case. The dude is so guilty but I’m gonna make bank.”

“Huh,” Jaemin nods as he listens. “Isn’t that kind of typical for you though? What made it so bad?”

“One of the paralegals walked out. Said he wouldn’t represent the guy or help me. Good luck getting employed anywhere else in the City with that kind of mindset,” Renjun snorts. 

“So you had to do paperwork like a newbie again?” Jaemin grins, knowing it’s exactly what Renjun is upset about. He hates doing simple tasks that are ‘below his paygrade’ considering he pays someone else to do them. 

"Do you have any idea how long I spent in discovery? And then researching other cases for precedents? Talk about the worst time to have your paralegal quit. I always knew I couldn't trust that rat-faced apple-polisher."

“Who’s a rat-faced apple polisher?” Jeno questions, looking between the two from the kitchen’s entry way. 

“Jun’s got a paralegal that walked out because he has too many morals. Think the city might hire him?”

Jeno hums, “maybe.”

“He took everything so literally. You tell him to roll over and he will, Jeno. You can’t say anything to him. I said we needed to let the cat out of the bag a few months ago, so he bagged his cat and brought it in.”

“Wait, it was that guy?” Jeno’s eyes do the thing where they crinkle at the corners and Renjun feels himself hit one hundred percent. 

Neither lawyer realizes that Jaemin turns back to the stove, giving their food the final finishing pushes of the spoon in the pan. 

Jaemin flicks the dial to the burner, turning it off, and tunes back into the conversation. 

“No, we can’t have three cats. That’s too much fur to get on all of my suits.”

“Oh the cat discussion again? Jeno, please go get changed,” Jaemin sighs, trying his hardest to keep his exasperation out of his voice.

“Fine, but just know that Hyun, Jung, and Hei are crying in their little makeshift street beds tonight,” he pouts.

Jaemin might let him have one cat.

Renjun stands up straight, hating that his knees ache from the way they were bent, and goes to the cupboard to grab napkins for everyone. Jaemin’s glad someone remembers-- he always forgets.

“How was your day?” Jaemin asks Jeno once they’re all seated and the food is plated. 

“Mm, good.” 

Conversation progresses in a manner that is typical and pleasant until Renjun shares with Jeno the news of his newest case and the details of his junior quitting.

"You took the murder case? Even though you knew I was on the case for the City? Renjun, you're breaking my heart."

"I'd break all 206 of your bones before I break your heart, Cutiepie."

"Oh God, stop with the Cutiepie, Honeybuns thing," Jaemin cuts in.

"Anyways," Renjun takes the lead of the conversation, "for the amount of money this guy has, and is paying me, I'll do my best to get him off."

"Acquitted," Jaemin corrects instantly. "You'll do your best to get him acquitted." 

"All those zeros," Renjun shakes his head in faux wistfulness, "I might take one for the team."

"Ah God. You defend the murderer and now you're thinking about--"

"Well, we knew Renjun loved money," Jaemin asserts before Jeno can continue. Sometimes it feels like he never leaves the bench and constantly has to play referee for his partners. The City prosecutor has a huge heart, but sometimes he upholds his moral code too strictly. That’s the Taurus in him, probably. 

And Renjun, well, he thirsts for challenges. Jaemin knows that he’s also a fan of how well the challenge cases pay. If anyone could sell a guilty person as an innocent to the jury, it would be Renjun. They ate him up most of the time.

“Who’s the suspect? Or, guy on charges, I mean.”

Jeno and Renjun glance at Jaemin as he rubs his forehead and shuts his eyes tiredly. It’s not like him; on the contrary, he’s usually energetic. They wait until he sits straight up again to continue talking. Jeno takes the chance to shovel most of his meal into his mouth. 

“LSM, the CEO of that big company?”

Jaemin screws his eyes up, “wasn’t he suspected of murder four years ago?”

Jeno nods, “yeah.”

“That’s extraneous,” Renjun claims. 

“You’re working with someone who is most definitely a murderer. Aren’t you afraid he might kill you too?”

“Not with Mr. Qian in the office.”

Jaemin snorts at Renjun’s quick thinking, knowing that Qian Kun would never let one of his junior partners get hurt. No one was scarier than him. Except maybe Judge Lee. Jaemin was the only person in the house not terrified of the man. 

“Anyways, that’s enough work talk.”

“Let’s talk about how I caught Jeno cyber-bullying people in the comments of cat videos on YouTube.” Renjun’s eyes narrow but Jeno doesn’t back down from their staring contest, even if Jaemin whips his head to stare at Jeno. Before long, Jeno caves to meet Jaemin’s gaze.

“I have to get my aggression out somehow,” he shrugs.

“If anyone is allowed to cyberbully people, it should be me. I have the hardest job in this relationship.”

“You mean sitting on your throne all day?” Renjun questions boredly.

“No.”

##  Deposition

“Well, good news and bad news,” Renjun announces as he sits at the table.

It’s all set with a basic dinner of rice, chicken, and vegetables. Jaemin didn’t have it in him to make anything special tonight, but neither of his boyfriends can complain since they don’t cook. 

“Bad news first,” Jaemin decides, bracing himself for the worst. 

“We didn’t settle anything at the deposition.”

Jeno pops the good news, “you’re our judge.”

Jaemin could put his head through a window right now. He doesn’t think it’s good news at all.

“Great. Looking forward to it.”

Jeno smiles his best lawyer smile, "how the City expects you to stay impartial when everyone knows you favor Injun is beyond me."

"This is why you should've accepted my offer earlier," Renjun snarks. 

Jaemin almost wishes he was back in a courtroom, between the glossy wooden paneling of the walls. Sat comfortably in his high backed chair with it's plush leather cushioning. The place where he has control. Oh, and lumbar support. Two lawyer boyfriends working the same case was sure to start some problems with his nervous system.

Except that since nothing was solved at the deposition, it won't be long til his lovers are actually bickering in his kingdom before him.

Jaemin doesn’t know of any other place in the world where judges are allowed to date lawyers. It seems to him that it would be a conflict of interest. He’d once asked the City for recusal and the woman behind the counter shrugged before going to get her superior, who then also shrugged, and the whole matter was settled with the relaxation of their shoulders. 

Apparently having two boyfriends was enough cause for the city to believe he could remain impartial.

“Sorry baby.”

“Today a witness on the stand said ‘remembering is literally killing me’,” Jaemin does a fake voice for extra effect, “and the defendant said ‘I want to literally kill you’ out loud and rolled his eyes.”

“No way,” Jeno laughs, easily distracted. 

“The one who was on trial for murder?” Renjun inquires with a raised brow. 

“Yeah. Jury didn’t need long to decide on that one.”

“Sounds like something Junnie would say.”

“Literally,” he agrees, face stoic. “Jaemin’s got it in him too.”

“Remember when we were in law school and that talkative guy was using logical fallacies?” Jeno laughs too hard to finish recounting his story, leaving the youngest confused.

“If my aunt had four wheels, she’d be a bus,” Renjun recites. 

“You held onto that longer than your client held the murder weapon,” he complains, tired of hearing the line over and over.

“Jaem, you’re just so funny. Remember you had that one case where the defendant was on the stand for cannibalism and he asked about having his last meal?” Jaemin doesn’t think he could ever forget hearing the case of a cannibal. The man didn’t look like he felt guilty, just sad to be caught. In fact, the way he considered his options on the stand that day might have been the funniest thing the judge has ever witnessed. “I still can’t believe you told him ‘babies aren’t on the menu’.”

“I still wish I had gone with you that day to see it,” Renjun sighs wistfully. 

“Oh, remember his attorney? The one that OD’d on coke?” Jeno snaps his fingers. “It was a year ago.”

“Oh, dang. Happy one year sober.”

##  Court Day

The hands on the clock on the wall point to close to the numbers twelve and one. Court will be in session soon and the wooden pews are filled with attorneys, assistants, and the occasional defendant.

"Taking a seat next to opposing counsel? Bold of you," Jeno teases.

"Don't flatter yourself. It was either here or next to that Dolphin mother--"

"Hey, he's not so bad."

"Is Mark our stenographer today?"

Jeno nods in confirmation after a brief glance towards the front of the courtroom.

"Oh good. I need someone to bully that isn't you."

“He’ll avoid you all day. Besides, Donghyuck is here, so you’ll have someone to terrorize others with.”

Court is called into session and, by some stroke of some kind of luck, they’re dead last on the docket.

Things start off slow and Renjun does his best to communicate how much he hates being present with his eyes to Donghyuck. He’s sure the man understands. 

Jeno subtly pats Renjun’s thigh once in a while to keep him from doing too much with his face. 

"From a utilitarian perspective, it would do more good--"

"From a utilitarian perspective, you should've been scraped," Renjun mutters under his breath.

Jeno pinches him and wears his same expression of serenity as always.

Okay, maybe he deserved that one. Renjun settles back into the pew and lets out a breath of air.

Both of them are forced to listen to the stupidity of the few petty cases before them. A big trial like their own should be its own event, but Renjun’s client had spent a lot of money for the case to be kept quiet.

Finally, it’s time for their case to be heard. It might take a few days if Renjun is being honest. And then of course Jaemin calls for a recess. Everyone flees the room and there’s not a doubt that ninety percent of the people exiting the room will never come back. That’s fine with him though. It’s more fun when they don’t have a bunch of people watching. Renjun gets to play more games.

  
  
  


BAILIFF LEE: All rise for the honorable Judge Na. 

HUANG rolls his eyes.

JUDGE NA enters the courtroom. 

CLERK HWANG: Good afternoon. Today is the XX of April 20XX. The case we will be hearing is the Citizens of N City versus L.S.M., case number 119-1277. 

Jaemin sorts through some of his papers and pulls one from the stack. He adjusts his glasses and clears his throat. 

JUDGE NA: Mr. L.S.M, you are being charged with murder in the first degree. How do you plead?

DEFENDANT: Not guilty.

Jeno gets ready to prove his case. The evidence is undeniable and there are a number of witnesses he has lined up from the company.

The case gets introduced and the jury hears opening statements from both of the attorneys present. 

Jeno takes his time putting up the evidence and linking most of it together. He can see Renjun’s bored, but he really wants to make the younger squirm.

“Permission to approach the bench,” Jeno calls.

Jaemin takes a moment to look at his face and he’s really a sucker for those eyes so he can’t say no.

“Granted.”

Renjun rolls his eyes and approaches the bench with Jeno. Jeno lowers his voice to keep their meeting relatively private. Donghyuck can probably hear them if he strains his ears, but he's not worried about him.

"They call me the Prosecutor."

"Oh for the love of God, shut up." Renjun rolls his eyes hard since he's not in anyone's view.

"That's literally your job, Mr. Lee," Jaemin claims from his seat, somehow managing to keep his tone from telling how exasperated he is by his boyfriend's antics. "You are a prosecutor for the City."

"You guys are no fun," he complains quietly with that ever-so-placid expression of his. Jaemin can tell he wants to pout and pull his puppy dog eyes (that honestly shouldn't work on his two fully-grown boyfriends); he doesn't, much to his relief.

“Conflict of interest. All of this is a conflict of interest,” Jaemin mutters to himself.

"This is riveting and lovely, but we  _ are _ in the middle of a trial here." Renjun looks bored as he reminds them. If Jaemin didn’t know better, he’d think the oldest was about two seconds from pulling out a nail file and filing his fingernails.

"I just wanted to say you guys looked cute. I'm putting this guy away no matter what happens here and it's kind of fun."

"You rotten bean-sprout, my win-loss ratio is perfect and I won't lose to you."

Jeno flexes his fingers to keep from reaching out to pet Renjun's hair. He's always so adorable when he's mad. Renjun cuts his eyes to Jaemin’s nameplate to keep from glaring at Jeno like a petulant child that’s filled with aggression and rage. 

Jaemin waves them back to their spots with his hand and he straightens his papers. 

Perhaps it wasn’t his intention, but Jeno’s words have brought out the challenger in Renjun. He looks more confident, like he’s got his game face on. 

JUDGE NA: Request for recess denied. Let’s make it through the evidence first. Mr. Lee, continue your presentation of evidence.

Jeno begins his presentation again with a charming look in his eyes as he starts to list more damning evidence and link it all together. A dedication to his facts is born throughout his words. 

As Jeno puts up more evidence, Renjun shoots Donghyuck a look. 

Mark's too busy typing out what Jeno is saying to the jury to pay any attention to him. 

'I wish that were me' he mouths to his friend as Jeno walks through the death of the victim. 

Donghyuck keeps a straight face, but his eyes tell Renjun that he understood and is laughing at his misery.

Next to him, his client sits, continuing to stare at the opposing counsel with a look that’s almost impassive. He can tell that the presiding juror, as well as several others in the crowd, finds him unnerving. The look is admittedly creepy and Renjun scribbles ‘relax your face’ on a paper before sliding it to him. 

It makes the man look slightly less seedy when he does so, but then again, he also looks kind of constipated. Maybe it’s the discomfort of having been sat down too long. They haven’t had a recess yet and it’s been an hour or so since their hearing started.

Jaemin calls for a recess since his sex-tuple shot americano hits his bladder all at once. The jury seems relieved as well if the presiding juror's, Bae Irene's, reaction is anything to go by.

Jeno and Renjun head to a restroom that isn't reserved for judges, pleased to be away from the scope they’re always under.

"At this rate, I'll be dead before we finish this case," Renjun laments to his boyfriend quietly so no one else hears.

"You haven't made this many self-depricating and suicide jokes since our final year in law school."

“Don’t push me Jeno Lee.”

“Cheer up. You probably have the guy in a strict contract anyways. You’ll get your money and the murderer will rot in jail.”

“I have a reputation to uphold. Besides, the guy’s connected to every client I’d like to represent in the future. I can’t throw it for you.”

“I don’t need you to throw it,” Jeno winks before leaving Renjun in the bathroom. 

JUDGE NA: Court is now back in session. I believe Mr. Lee had concluded his presentation of evidence. Mr. Huang.”

HUANG: Thank you, Judge Na. Good afternoon jurors. My client is...

A witness takes the stand and Jeno watches LSM adjust the sleeves of his suit. Renjun tears into the witness after Jeno is done asking questions. Although he succeeds in making the witness seem inaccurate, he’ll have to do the same for several more witnesses.

On the other hand, he does his best to smile and appeal to the jurors.

HUANG, smirking: you didn't say that when--

LEE, panicking: Objection!

JUDGE NA, visibly paler, reaching for gavel: Sustained. Order!

LEE: As I was saying...

The back and forth continues with new evidence and falsified witness testimonials being thrown out. It’s one of the messiest court cases Jaemin has ever been presented, but he supposes that’s what happens when his boyfriends, two of the best lawyers in town, have to pick apart a murder case. 

  
  


The jurors file into the courtroom last, looking haggard and distressed. 

JUDGE NA, under his breath: this poor jury.

BAILIFF LEE escorts the defendant back to the desk.

JUDGE NA: The jury will now announce their decision.

PRESIDING JUROR BAE: The jury finds the defendant guilty.

Jeno’s eyes gleam but he holds his winning smile back for now under the guise of professionalism. 

No one makes an outburst, but Renjun is clearly displeased he will have to do more work. He had to say he knew it was coming, though. Next time he just needs a jury full of braindead idiots and a less successful attorney as opposing counsel.

JUDGE NA: Court dismissed. 

Jaemin sighs and pulls his glasses off, standing to head back into his chambers. Renjun will definitely appeal that decision and earn more money. Jeno will be pleased with himself. 

There's some work he has to attend to before he can leave for the day. And tonight, Jaemin has dinner with his boyfriends at a restaurant of his choosing. 

Usually, the restaurant is decided by whoever's had a rough day in court. Today, it's clearer than pure spring water that he has had the hardest day out of all of them. 

Back in the administerial hallway, Mark pushes his glasses up and rubs where they sit on his nose. 

“How do you deal with that constantly?”

“How do you deal with Donghyuck constantly?”

Mark ignores his knowing smile and then counts his stars. He doesn’t mind that Jaemin has two boyfriends, but he’s glad he only has one. Managing two when one was as wild and clingy as Hyuck would be impossible. 

Bailiff Lee joins the attorneys after relinquishing custody of the prisoner to the cop that’s responsible for releasing murderers. Jeno and Renjun are both packing and organizing their papers.

“Hey, Jen, heard a good one the other day while I was working security.”

“Oh yeah?”

Renjun rolls his eyes knowing that whatever leaves Donghyuck’s mouth next is gonna be another lawyer joke and that Jeno’s going to laugh at it anyway because he’s a total sweetheart with low standards.

“You know what happens when you give a lawyer a viagra? He gets taller.”

“Aww, come on, man,” Jeno says through a laugh. 

Renjun snorts, “don’t make me start on the rent-a-cop jokes, Donghyuck.”

“Jeno, call your guard dog off,” Donghyuck whines. “I can’t take another round of joking about donuts and brutality.”

“Hmm, maybe you should re-think your career then,” Renjun comments lightly, but it still stings the way he intended it to. 

“You lawyers think you’re so smart with your words but I went to public school and made it through the academy so you can’t hurt me.”

Jeno just pats Donghyuck’s shoulder, “Renjun’s firm has a spot open for a paralegal.”

“Ugh, sell my soul to the devil for money?” He sighs. “Renjun, how much do you pay an hour?”

“However much it takes for you to leave the world’s worst profession.”

“Yeah okay. You want my resume in a PDF or print?”

“Print.”

##  Result

Jeno has low standards when it comes to food. He’s not really picky, he doesn’t like to cook, and he hates eating at expensive restaurants, so he picks a bar close to where they went to school. The food is of less than great quality, but it’s his day to choose so Renjun and Jaemin can’t say anything about it. 

They put their orders in and Jeno drinks a victory beer. Surprisingly, Renjun has a cosmo. He didn’t think they served those at the bar. 

“Let’s get married. I can’t take the City assigning me to cases with either of you as representatives.”

“Perhaps it will be good for tax purposes,” Renjun agrees.

“We are a thruple,” Jeno interrupts their musings. “As much as I love you guys and like the sound of that, we won’t be able to get legally married so both of those things you pointed out are impossible.”

Jaemin leans over to pinch his cheek, “doesn’t matter.”

“Another cosmo with vodka and orphan tears for the antichrist,” the tall waiter says as he sets down Renjun’s drink. “And for sequin smile, we have a beer.”

“Sequin smile?” Jaemin questions, watching the server clear Jeno’s empty glass. 

“I said his eyes got squinty when he smiled, but Ten said I can’t say that, so sequin it is.”

“You’re an only child, aren’t you?” Renjun asks with narrowed eyes. “You could have stood to be bullied as a child.”

The server just laughs, “yeah, yeah. Anyways, your food’ll be done soon.”

They wait til he’s just out of earshot to resume talking.

“How many of him do you think it would take to plaster this whole wall?” Renjun muses. 

Jaemin’s feeling somewhat mean after his exhausting day too. He answers with “how hard do you think Jeno could throw him?”

“Ten’s enough to cover that stain on the ceiling,” Jeno responds with a smile. 

Yeah, they’re all a good choice for one another. 


End file.
